There can be no doubt that Seán Boylan has done marvellous work for Meath football over the past eighteen years, and no one in the Royal County can begrudge him that, asserts An Fear Rua...

Now, however, if recent reports from Dunboyne are to be believed, the Old Football Alchemist Himself may find himself embroiled at the heart of a controversy that goes to the very root of Meath's footballing identity and prowess. 'What in the name of God could that be?', I hear some of you asking. Others will say, 'Don't mind him, it's just An Fear Rua up to his old 'stirring' tricks again'. But what about a proposal to sell off hundreds of acres of good Meath land - almost up to their front doors in Dunboyne - to Fingal (or, in reality, Dublin) County Council and have the land transferred from county Meath into county Dublin? And what if one of the landowners who stands to gain a reported £2 million, if the deal goes through, was the great Seán Boylan himself? Think of the future generations of good footballers lost to the local Saint Peter's Club and to Meath itself, turning out instead in the navy-and-blue of the Dubs?

Seán Boylan's family have been in Dunboyne for over two hundred years. His father rose to the rank of Commandant-General in the War of Independence and his role in that struggle - as a right hand man of the incomparable Mick Collins - was second to none. Seán's own work as a herbalist has brought improved health and relief from pain to literally thousands of people in every corner of Ireland, including some close relatives of An Fear Rua himself. The Boylan family are one of a small number of families who own land near the old railway line in Dunboyne right up to what our Yankee friends call 'the county line' with Dublin. Clonee is only a few hundreds yards down the road. Now, because of the inexorable growth of Dublin, some madcap planner has come up with the idea of buying the last remaining green belt from County Meath, transferring it to the jurisdiction of the neighbouring county and covering it with houses and concrete.

Understandably, many of the people of Dunboyne could be described as fairly 'boilin'' over this controversial proposal and there have been public meetings and petitions against it. Their concern is that the current 180 acres now slated for housing development is 'only the thin end of the wedge' and that - if they're not stopped - Fingal/Dublin will continue to encroach into the Meath heartlands. (A similar 'expansion' row has been going on across the river Suir between Waterford corporation and Kilkenny county council, with a major consideration being the the consequences for hurling clubs in the Black-and-Amber county). If feelings in the Meath village continue to run high enough, AFR believes it will take more than a few All Ireland and Leinster triumphs to assuage them but, at the same time, it is hard to begrudge a decent man like Seán the reported £2 million windfall.

Of course, the whole thing raises an interesting option for the solution of the problems of so-called 'weaker' counties? I mean, if you can't win a provincial or an All Ireland title from your own resources, why not buy in a few thousand acres, with accompanying population and GAA clubs, from your more successful neighbours? If the idea caught on, county boards might even persuade their wealthy sponsors to foot the bill, rather than have to dip into their own coffers. AFR believes there is little doubt, for example, that Larry Goodman's AIBP Group could buy a fair oul chunk of Cavan for the lads and lassies in the 'Wee' county and still have enough left over to put petrol in Larry's helicopter. Equally, Eircell and Esat Digifone could put a fair few million quid into play to help their respective counties, and the obvious thing for Glanbia - who sponsor both counties - is to get Waterford and Kilkenny together in hurling and finally put the Decies folks out of their misery. An Fear Rua could foresee 'GAA' auctions, maybe even on the internet: 'Ladies and gentlemen... Ah, come on now... What am I bid for this fine slice of county XX? Several thousand acres of good farming land, a population of ten thousand ranging in age from two months old to ninety nine years, two senior football clubs and an intermediate hurling club, who won their divisional championship last year... Do I hear a bid of two 'millon' to start me off?... Who'll give me two 'millon' for this attractive property, being sold as a going concern?...'

Recent reports from Croke Park suggest that as many as thirteen county boards may be technically insolvent because of overspending, particularly on managers and teams. Here's an instant solution to those problems. Sell off a few thousand acres on the county boundary and keep the bank manager off your back. Counties like Cork, Galway, Kilkenny and Tipperary are big enough and successful enough that they could surely spare a few parishes for places like Waterford or Laois and make themselves a few million into the bargain.

This would not, of course, be the first time the GAA prospered because of the vagaries of local authority 'planning'. Not so long ago, the Kinnegad-Coralstown club in county Westmeath made a cool £1.82 million on the sale of their grounds, having bought them for a mere £2,500 back in 1969. The spectacular growth of the Midlands town meant a developer was willing to fork out that kind of money so he could build seventy new houses. The club got enough money to buy twenty acres of land very near the old pitch and, presumably, to throw a right old hooley for the members. In county Kildare, Athy GAA club have been trying to sell their lands for some months past and they are reported to be in negotiations. There are rumours of a Dublin builder being willing to pony up around £900,000 for the lands. Local residents are opposing the sale, however, because they claim the land was donated in trust to the GAA in the 1960s and so should only be used for sporting purposes.

But whatever happens in Dunboyne in the short term, wouldn't it be a supreme irony if a Dublin All Ireland winning team in, say, twenty years time, were captained to success by a young lad named Seán Óg Boylan, from Dunboyne?...