Some of our older readers will remember it too: 'Run rabbit, run rabbit, run, run, run...'. It was very popular during the Forties as a morale booster for the British forces in World War Two. Many's the British Tommy tunelessly whistled it as he fought his way across the burning sands of Tobruk or up through the backbone of Italy in that great democratic crusade against Hitler-Fascism. (We in Ireland, of course, never recognised this a World War, but were content to notch it up as an 'Emergency'. A classic understatement if ever there was one.)

There was a Rabbitte on the rampage this week - not on the run - and it was the Galway senior hurling captain, that decent man, Joe Rabbitte. The ones on the run were the presenter, producer and researcher of the RTÉ Radio One morning programme, 'The Maura O'Neill Show'. (Maura is the misfortunate freelance journalist from Maynooth in the County of Kildare who was handed the poisoned chalice of trying to fill the daily broadcasting slot of Marian Finucane while that elegant performer takes a well-earned Summer breather).

RTÉ were forced to apologise to Joe Rabbitte for a debacle that happened during a live broadcast of 'The Maura O'Neill Show'. RTÉ had decided to devote the programme to a preview of the All Ireland camogie senior final. Things were going well until an impostor called the show claiming to be the Galway star. This gent singled out camogie as a sport for fat women trying to shed excess pounds. He claimed it was 'unladylike' and said women would be better off playing 'sexier' games like tennis or golf. Now, while AFR has long been an admirer of the likes of Anna Kournikova cavorting around the centre court at Wimbledon, the sight of Gowlnacalley-John Redmonds' star forward Gertie McDonnelly in full flight towards goal, hurley in one hand and ball clenched in another, skirts flying, would make even a dead man rise up. Gertie, some of you may recall, came third one year in the heat for the title of Tipperary Queen of the Plough. And, An Fear Rua dimly recalls, in Gertie's case the word 'heat' was apt alright...

The caller went on to say that camogie and womanise' football should be scrapped. 'The women should realise the whole country is laughing at them', he said. He also claimed Gaelic games were 'unhealthy' for women! This reminds AFR of the time not so long ago when certain priests opposed women playing soccer because 'it might damage their breasts and reproductive organs' and others worried that allowing them to play basketball or indulge in horseriding might jeopardise their virginity. As one of the bright sparks of Gowlnacalley-John Redmonds remarked when he heard that: 'Mother Ireland is rearing them yet...'

Following the controversial broadcast, there were literally hundreds of phone calls to Joe Rabbitte's place of work and a seething Rabbitte was forced to go on Galway FM radio to deny all. A fifty-six years old man from the Galway suburb of Rahoon, named Pádraic Walsh, has admitted he is the culprit. There was a shot of a topless Mr Walsh cheering the victorious Galway footballers on page one of Ted Crosbie's Examining Organ at the weekend showing enough fat and blubber to make even Dingle's 'Fungie' or the new Clare dolphin envious. Mr Walsh certainly had the look of a man who could do with a few games of camogie to lose fat, whatever about the women he was criticising.

This despicable episode is all too typical of the continuing decline in standards in RTÉ. It is absolutely pathetic that a hoax caller should get through on air like this and it is astonishing that they should succeed in impersonating a prominent public personality, very much to the detriment of that person's standing. That it should happen following previous, similar hoaxes on 'Live Line', 'The Gerry Ryan Show' and the (now departed) 'Gay Byrne Show' illustrates that - like the Bourbons - RTÉ forget everything and remember nothing. Typically of the Montrose Mandarins, their first response was to offer Joe Rabbitte time to defend himself on yet another of the station's interminable phone-in programmes. Their real agenda here, of course, was not to help Joe, but to inveigle him into providing more 'copy' for the voracious RTÉ machine. Fortunately, a few turns around the championship hurling field have more than wised Rabbitte up, and a phone call instead from his solicitor helped to focus the Montrose Mandarins on an apology.

However, one of hurling's greatest is not satisfied with this response, and rightly so, asserts An Fear Rua. Instead, Rabbitte has decided to sue RTÉ because of the alleged damage to his name and reputation. AFR believes such an action would not only cover the hurler's costs, but should be good for 'compo' of around £50,000, which RTÉ will most likely settle long before the case reaches the courts. That contention is based on the assessment of some of AFR's friends in the legal profession though, as AFR has often remarked, many of the same lawyers wouldn't know one end of a hurley from the other. (Notable exceptions are the Clare footballer, Bryan McMahon, and The Honourable Mr Joseph Brolly BL Himself).

This episode is also indicative of the general malaise affecting RTÉ's attitude towards Gaelic games. For example, some people have recently criticised the running order of the radio show 'Sunday Sport' because the Gaelic games segment is completed by the time fans get from attending the games to listening to the radio. The recent row over Pat Spillane's comments on TV regarding certain Kildare players was another straw in the wind. But what can you expect from a Sports Department run by a man like Tim O'Connor whose real love is soccer and whose predecessors include Fred Cogley (first love = rugby) and Michael O'Hehir who, despite all his Gaelic commentating, always cited horse racing as his favourite sport? Despite the huge interest in Gaelic games, the native sports have always had to fight for air time in Montrose.

The Rabbitte episode opens up all sorts of speculation about who will be the next GAA personality to be impersonated on RTÉ. Will we have callers to the farmers' programme telling them when to dose their sheep against hoose, ringworm and liver fluke with Nilverm and claiming to be DJ Carey? Maybe someone will ring up 'Live Line' offering advice on insurance and mileage rates and claim to be Dónal O'Neill or Jarlath Burns?

With increasing competition from UTV, even from TV3 and from on-line broadcasters, it's no wonder RTÉ's audiences have been in steep decline for many years. An Fear Rua's First Law of Sports Broadcasting says: 'The higher the egos rise in RTÉ... the greater the decline in audience numbers...'.